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Timing, intuitive or planned?

It seems to me that a all of life can be summed up in the ability to time something well.

Success or failures lies with your ability to time when to:

  • Take a cake out of the oven.

  • Jump off a diving board.

  • Drive through an intersection.

  • Cut down a tree.

  • Walk across the street.

  • Gas up a car.

You can come up with your own examples. When you face a difficult conversation, timing is off the essence. I remember 49 years ago as a young bride being taught a truth that has served me well most of my married far! When there is a difficult topic to discuss with your spouse, don't jump into it as soon as you both finish your work for the day. Likely your blood sugars, your energy, your patience will all be low. Not a good time to be reasonable, kind or have any ability to listen well and be able to move forward together.

There is a proverb that a says: A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver.

Timing is crucial.

Whether the difficult conversation is with a spouse, a child, a friend or at work, there are some simple, basic principles that a work.

A simple little tool that has helped me with timing is to:

Pre conversation prep:

  1. Clarify the issue

  2. Check your outlook and attitude about the issues and the person you want to speak to.

  3. Seek a time that a is mutually acceptable.

  4. Invite instead of demanding a conversation.

The Conversation:

  1. A short clear and simple statement of the situation as you see it.

  2. An invitation to hear the other perspective(s).

  3. An invitation to talk about the desired outcome(s).

  4. An mutual opportunity to find a common solution now or in a future conversation.

  5. A recap and commitment to accountability of actions.

My premise is: If you want to be heard then consider how, what, why, and where you speak with each other.

Don't put that a conversation off, it simply drains your energy. Get on and free your heart and mind for other things that a fill you up and make you a positive energy for yourself and others.

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